Monday, March 7, 2011

Rain




Rain comes down relentless, and it's raining inside too. It is early morning, and I am already feeling overwhelmed.
"Lord," I pray "Help me make it through this day..."

I am retreating in my room, and I fumble for words as I stare blankly at the rain coming down. Just flowing and emptying out.
The prayer doesn't come. I am mesmerized by water sheeting across fields.

"Lord, please hear my unformed prayer. You know just what I need."
It is a simple prayer, but one that resonates. He fashions and shapes all; He can take the unformed prayer and form it to perfection.

I keep watching the rain. It is belting, billowing, weeping wildly a deluge. As I keep this rain vigil, the water begins to take shape.  I start to see individual raindrops as they make their way to the earth. Each little droplet has to fall separately from the sky, making its way in unison with all the other single droplets plunging.

"That's what it's like some days," I think. "There are days when I feel every drop of rain hitting individually. Every disappointment, every failing- another drop stinging as it hits my face. And all the drops pool and puddle until they spill over."

I gaze longer, still ruminating.

"But it's the rain that renews the earth, the rain that causes life to flourish. God sends the rain to replenish. And the rain is made up of single drops. All the hardships and frustrations I experience in my life are the droplets bringing life, carrying me closer to God."

It seems that the shapeless prayer of a helpless child has been heard, bearing encouragement and consolation. I leave my room, back to the battle ground. Later in the day I read the fitting words from a devotional:

"Passionate attachment to Jesus, in spite of our human failings, is what pleases the Father most. Whether or not we do the right things, whether or not we keep our promises, is not as important as our attitudes and our willingness to turn to God for forgiveness each time we sin. We may see only our unbelief and failings, but Jesus sees the desires of our hearts."

Let us have faith, then,  that the rain of life will renew our souls as we seek to find God in heavenly showers.